Oh wow.

37 days left!! Oh man!!! I am sooo beyond excited. Pretty much everything is done so far. I haven't packed and started living out of a suitcase, I'll wait till Kevin gets here. Pretty much everything is packed too. I just have to tape shut a few boxes. really can't believe not only am I getting married, but I'm moving 1,000 miles away!! AND some awesome news: I'm losing mad weight. When I started my weight loss, I was at 320 something. I just wanted to get under 300. Last time I went to the doctor I weighed 294!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That makes me soooo happy!! Lots of changes for me!! lots!

Excuse me, Tyra

I watch the Tyra Banks show. Actually like it most of the time. Recently she's been doing multiple shows focusing on race and racism topics. She has done 2 or 3 shows about where have all the good black men gone and why can't black women find good black men and things like that. I don't understand. Tyra makes it seem like black men should only date black women. That if they should prefer another race, they're wrong and shouldn't think like that. She also says that black women can't find the right black men to marry. Do black women HAVE to only be with black men? In case you haven't seen Kevin, he's black. In case you haven't seen me, I'm white. Are we wrong because a black man is with me and I'm white? Are we not supposed to be together because some black women can't find a black man to be with? Tyra? Can you answer me these questions? She talks about doing shows to break race barriers, I think shows like this promote them. Am I going to get shit from people who think I stole a good black man from deserving black women? I'm confused, Tyra.

Weddings

One of my good friends got married this weekend after a 3 year engagement. 3 YEARS?! I couldn't imagine. This year long one is driving me bonkers. But, The wedding was beautiful and just made me more excited about mine. Since I knew the bride pretty well, I was backstage a lot helping wherever needed. So I kinda got a feel for how my day was going to be. Except, her wedding was at 3 and mine is at 11. Every time I say that to someone, it shocks me. Why did I make the wedding at 11? I'm going to have to get up at like 3 or 4 am. Oh well. I was smoking crack that day....Kevin says he's getting excited and he misses me a lot, so that makes me feel great. And I've been so cocky lately. I'll be looking in the mirror an smile to myself and say to my mom or to myself, "Kevin is SO lucky! I'm very pretty" Narcissistic, I know. Oh well. Not too much longer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Too excited. Soo excited!!

Oh Wow

I looked at the countdown today!!! Only 44 days left!! But I'm most excited about seeing Kevin a whole week before the wedding! I miss him soooo much!!

Blacker the Berry, Sweeter the Juice.

My mom called me this morning, "Kara, they're lining up to pick fruit!" I wasn't all that excited. But, I woke up and decided to walk up to the pickin' place. I'd already got blueberries so I decided to try blackberries. Did you know they have thorny varieties and non-thorny varieties of blackberries?? My hands know. I couldn't find the non-thorny blackberries! I got stuck a lot and I kept hearing people telling others that others in their group had bloody arms and hands already. So after 2 little plastic bins were filed. I was done. And, there were a lot of people. It was hard to find ripe blackberries. I wanna make cobbler or something, but we need more butter. I also got a yellow squash.

Wind Ridge Farm Need a pickin partner? I live next door!!!!

Another Bad Dream

Things have been going great! No freak outs or fights or crying. Just great. Although, I did have a bad dream last night. It was the day of my wedding and I was walking down the aisle in my dress and everything. Except the pastor. He was not Pastor Bob. He was some weird dude that looked like an old annoying actor that I can't think of his name. He was SOOOOO annoying!! Then I woke up.

It's a beautiful day in the hood

Kevin won't answer my question of do we live in the hood. Is that a yes?

Parker has big muscles!

This is Parker showing off his guns...

HiYa!!!!!!!!!!!

Me, mom, and the kids got to see Kung Foo Panda last night for free, thanks to my parent's stock broker. Such a cute movie. Jack Black is funny in animation as well. Cute story and, just cute. Parker would wave his hands around like he was doing kung foo moves during the fight scenes. It's definitely a kids movie, but cute for adults to take kids to too. Kevin would've loved this movie...

Yay!

This is going to be a fun rest of the week!! I get to watch the kids!!! My niece & nephew! I'm sure I'll be tired of this by later today. NAH! This is gonna be a blast!! My sis and her husband are going on their honeymoon from 2 years ago. Bout time! They didn't really have the money when they got married, and then there was that whole 13 month deployment thingy. So they've [Jen at least] have been planning this for awhile. Hope they have fun!!!

Favors:Done.

I ordered my awesome magnets about 5 minutes ago. Woo hoo for cool magnet favors that will hopefully get people that come to my wedding to write me once in a while. Here's hoping!! Kevin says he hasn't been acting special, just like himself, that he loves me. Super sweet! He makes me want to eat some S'Mores...which I will do. I've reorganized my 2 bins FULL of wedding stuff. One of reception stuff and one of kids table stuff. I don't know how good of a time the adults will have, but the kids will have a blast fo sho. My room is almost clean & packed. My dream of packing everything and living out of a suitcase fir the next 53 days is almost a reality!!! I can't wait!! The kids (Gabby & Parker) are coming tomorrow to stay till Friday and after they're gone, I will pack up everything!!!! Yay for Friday/Saturday. Oh! I forgot to mention Gabby's reaction to the pillow I made her for her birthday. She loved it, despite how sad it looked! Jen, her mom, said that that night she was going to bed and hugging the pillow. She took a big whiff and sighed, "It smells like Sissy."
Very cute. I have it now from last time she stayed with me so it will smell like me again. I asked her what I smelled like. She look at me and said, "sissy." with this 'DUH' look on her face. I'm very glad she liked it. makes me happy that she'll have that after I'm in New York.

Correction

I'm not so smart. It's actually 53 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm back

I kinda went on a lil hibernation of staying in my bed pretty much a lot. Oh, and my mom dragged me around shoe shopping. Not for me, shoes for her. She has about 5 pairs of shoes for the wedding. She just needs to stop buying shoes. I hate to tell her that no one will be looking at her. It's all about MMEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! I'm in a much better mood recently and Kevin has been so great through all of this (except that lil bit in the beginning). I know both of us are tired of the distance. But, only 64 more days to go! 54!? I gotta get packing...haha, but really I should.

I think I'm going insane.

So. This whole wedding/moving thing has got me stressed. Stressed to the max. And I feel like no one understands. No one will help pack, even a little. Kevin just doesn't want to hear anything. And the doctor caused a whole nother break down today. So this morning I woke up around 4am and started to freak out. Why? I couldn't tell you. Nothing "set it off" or anything but I freaked out till about 8:30. Worst 4 hours of my life. My mom comes in my room and see's my face and wonders what's wrong. I start crying and tell her I don't know I'm freaking out.
"Why?" she responds to which I have no answer. Then she says I should call my Dr. to see if I can get some Xanax. Woo Hoo drugs. I'm on Welbutrin for my slight depression due to the stress and that stuff just isn't doin it. So I call the doctor and go to an appointment at 9:50. My mom & I get to the doctor's and they call my name. My mom asks if I want her to come in. Sure, why not, right? Nah. Not that great of an idea in hindsight. We're telling the doctor about my recent freak out and then my mother decides to tell the doctor about how I can't hold a job. I can't, I've had 4 in one year, but what does that have to do with anything? So the doctor says I should see this psychiatrist because whatever it is that is causing me to not be able to hold a job might be a factor that will come up later and might be why I couldn't hold a marriage together. WHAT?! I started bawling. I love Kevin. So much. That just freaked me out even more.
So we get back to the car and Kevin calls to see what the doctor said. So I handed the phone to my mom the nurse cause she could explain it better. And she did and told Kevin that he should just be nice to me and give me some TLC for a while.
So I found some cute toy golf sets for the boys' gifts in my wedding. I called Kevin to ask if he had already gotten them something, let alone think about it. And of course not. So I bought these toy golf sets. Is Kevin nice to me? No. He tells me how stupid that is and just UGH! I don't even want to talk about it. We fought all day. ALL DAY! How is that being nice to me? That's TLC? I had no idea. So we resolved all of that. Fast forward to 10 minutes ago. I called him to talk and he wants to watch some dumb movie rather than talk to me. Fine. Whatever. Sometimes he makes me so angry. I still love him, but I am so beyond waiting for this crap to happen. I'm tired of being tired of waiting. I don't want to wait for the rest of my life to start. This whole thing is just done. I don't even want a wedding anymore. Anything to get this over and done with and me moved. Anything. And on top of all this, I miss Kevin's behind like CRAZY. I miss him soooooooooooooooooooooooo bad.

I think the kitchen is complete!

All I needed was a clock. So what did I find today?? Cupcake patches. What did I do with them?
A cupcake clock!! And I made it myself!! This I am extremely proud of!! Now it's time to go post kitchen pics to MySpace and Facebook so everyone can look on in awe at how cool I am and be jealous. Jealous of my fantastic kitchen.

My kitchen cont. And my bathroom

I'm so over and done with getting stuff for the wedding (except fun things for the kids table...). I' way more interested in making/acquiring things to make my NYC apartment look awesome! I think I'm doing a good job so far. My latest projects include making the cupcake kitchen chalkboard. And here's how it turned out:I think it looks pretty sweet. Sweet as in awesome and sugary. I love love love using scrap booking paper for backgrounds in projects. It's inexpensive (4/$1.00 or 2/$1.00 or less)and comes already colored and designed! Great.
Now my bathroom is going to be pretty cool too. Me and my mom were at some store and found a New York skyline shower curtain. Instant bathroom decorating theme! So, using my aunt's nifty picture making idea I now have these to go into the bathroom:











And yesterday and the wonderful Hobby Lobby, their wall decorations were 50% off. That's always a good deal, right? Yes it is. My mommy found this that I bought: Yeah that's metal.
















Also while we were roaming around Hobby Lobby, my mom found this magnet That I forgot to take a picture of before I sent it this mornin, but this is what it says with a different picture:I thought it was very cute considering I don't get there for 2 more months. Hahahahahahaha. My home is going to be the cutest ever!

That's the way the cupcake gets frosted...

That's the pink strainer, measuring items, and I forgot the pink mixing spoons my sizzle got me. Oh and it really doesn't matter what Kevin thinks, haha. I mean, I would love for him to warm up to the cupcake kitchen idea, but I've already bought most of the stuff for the kitchen and cupcake kitchen is just how it's going to be *insert me holding my hands up and shrugging* Oh well!

So last trip to New York, What I refer to as "My Last New York Vacation", Kevin bought a new video game that I quickly became obsessed with. By obsessed I mean Kevin would leave me for work and I'd be playing the game. He'd come home and I would be in the same spot, staring intently at the game, still playing intensely. Like a wonderful loving boyfriend, he let me take this PlayStation 2 game home, knowing that I did not have a PlayStation 2.
"But!" I had begged, "My sizzle does! I'm over there all the time!"Puhleeese!!!"
He allowed me to take *our* game home with me as long as I promised to never let it leave my sight. :"YES!!" I had cried joyously.
What was this horribly addicting game you ask? MARVEL VS. CAPCOM 2!!!!!!!!!!!!! This game rocks my socks. Last night I went over to my sizzle's house to play. We love virtually kicking each others ass.

We hadn't been playing very long (i.e.: I hadn't been kicking their butts that long) when I looked down and saw this: A blood blister on my thumb that didn't start hurting till after I noticed it...Man, I love playing this game. It might just look like I'm smashing buttons crazy randomly, but for the most part, I actually know what I'm doing. I spent all day while Kevin was at work practicing my craft.









Now a lot of people ask me who's my favorite character. I pick the girls a lot.Felicia is a girl I use a lot. She's quite skanky looking, but she'll totally scratch your eyes out. One of the male I use all the time is Blackheart. He spits out naked mole rat thingys that suck your face. He's pretty cool. I'm pretty sure this is the character that gave my niece Gabby nightmares. Oh, did I mention my niece loves this game? Wants me to bring it over every time I come over? She loves it. Have any of you played this game? Do you have a PlayStation 2? I can come over to your house and play! Hahahaha! Yeah, I love this game. And I'm really not a fan of video games in general. [while you're picking characters this chick sings "I wanna take you for a ride" and for the longest time Sizzle thought it sang "Jesus is alive"]

The internet's version of tag!

I have been tagged! Which excites me very much. I always want to be tagged and I have been tagged! Thanks Sabrina! If I tag you, here's what you gotta do!:

1. Write the title to your own memoir using 6 words.
2. Post it on your blog.
3. Link to the person who tagged you.
4. Tag 5 more blogs.

Kara's memoir:

The Cupcake Has Been Frosted Twice
The tale of one woman's journey through life and how she deals with a chance at starting over after a near fatal car accident.


Was that ok? Okay, now people I tag are:

Shannon
Adam
Kara
Ariella
Brad

Have fun!!!

My Kitchen

Have I talked about my kitchen yet?? I don't think so...I'm beyond excited about putting my kitchen together at our new apartment. Pink & Cupcakes, who could ask for more? Kevin abhors the idea, but I think he's come to grips with the fact that our kitchen is going to be pink and filled with cupcakes. I've been gathering pink and cupcake kitchen stuff for the longest time. My favorite thing was my cupcake cookie jar that I found at Target. My sizzle got me a pink strainer, pink measuring spoons & cups, and cupcake bowls. Next to the cookie jar is one of my cupcake placemats. I also have a cute table cloth from my bridal shower. My sizzle also found a cupcake that holds a dish scrubber. SO cute!! My niece got me some cup cake dish towels like the cupcake dish rags at the top. I found a pink whisk . Also I found cute pink & white everyday dishes and cups and a mixing bowl. My best friend Amanda got me some pink cooking pans and pink mixing bowls. I found tons of pink cooking utensils at the dollar store, so I have pink spatulas, etc. too!!! I made this picture today:
I love it! A frame and cupcake scrap booking stickers and look how cool that is! I also found a precious moments chalkboard at a garage sale. I took out the precious moments picture, covered the board with cute whit scrap booking paper and the front of a card I got from my bridal shower that says: "Take life one cupcake at a time" and out lined the picture in pink puff paint. And wa lah! A cute homemade cupcake chalkboard. I'll take picture as soon as it's put back together, but it is very cute!!!

Pack it up

I think I'm actually going to get some more packing done. I also am in need of more boxes. My aunt just moved here from Kenosha, WI so hopefully she still has some of her emptied boxes.

What's happening?

I don't know what my problem is. I'm anxious, crabby, and honestly just sick and tired of being 1,000 miles away from Kevin. Every time I express this to him he says, "Geez, it's only 2 months away" And I can hear his eyes roll over the phone. Then he says, "But baby, I love you! It's only 2 more months, sugarplum." Because he knows I would like him to be nice about the whole situation. I'm stressed, and quite wigged out. I have a TON of packing still left. I want to pack up clothes for the next 2 months and pack everything else and be done with it. But, I've been wanting to do that for the past months or so. I've really just gotta stop and do it. Just quit waiting for help and do it. Ugh!








On another note, today is my niece Gabby's birthday party. She'll be 5 on the 7th. That's amazing! I made her a pillow for her birthday. It's supposed to be a cute Cinderella pillow. The pillow that goes inside the cover was too small and it looks horrible! That makes me upset. This is the last birthday I'll be here with her and I can't even get her something good. I'm a horrible aunt sissy [that's what she calls me]. She constantly tells her mom she's going to move to New York to live with aunt Sissy. And every time we talk about me getting married and talks about me moving to New York. It tears me up inside. I've been there for that child since she was born! And Parker, her little brother too!! I babysit for them all the time, I love it! These kids are awesome. All I know is Jenny better keep me VERY well updated! I want pictures, the works! I would love to hear Parker talking for real. That is going to be awesome. Hearing the things that come out of Gabby's mouth is already amazing so I can't even imagine what Parker is going to say...Yeah yeah, I'm gonna miss my mom and dad and stuff. But I'm going to miss My sizzle, Gabby, and Parker the most.

This was a card I saw

Life is like a roller coaster, it goes up and down, makes you scream, and costs a lot to ride. -Hannah Cheatem age 6

Delicious from my Phone

I rock. I rock so hard. My pie is delicious!

Kevin is SO lucky!!

So, since I'm going over to my friends' house tonight, I thought I should be all nice Suzy homemaker and make them a blueberry pie out of those blueberries I picked the other day. So I got the pie assembled and had some left over crust and filling and made a little turnover type dealy. So When the turnover thingy was done, I split it between me, my mom, and my dad. And all agreed, I AM AWESOME! That's the finished pie over there. And in case you couldn't tell, in honor of the 4th of July, that's a firework in the pie crust...So I had called Kevin earlier just to let him know exactly how lucky he is. Not only will I make him a blueberry pie, but I hand make the crust, too [no pre-made pie crust there!] AND not only will I hand make the crust, I'll even go pick the damn blueberries. Kevin is the luckiest man alive.

Dream a Little Dream

I just has a very bad dream. Not a nightmare, just not a good dream. First of all I missed my trial run hair appointment. I was out of town or something crazy. Then my church had to back out of the wedding. The church?! I freaked. We've already sent the invitations!, cried many times. The worst part was I had to go to a new hairdresser since I missed my original hair appointment. And for some really weird reason me and my sister had switched bodies?? [I have no clue] Now, My hair is quite long and it's been growing for quite a while. I love it now, but originally started growing it out because Kevin liked long hair.So anyway, My body [Jen's mind] is sitting in the hairdressers chair. The hairdresser says that My hair is too damaged, he's going to need to cut some of the bottom off. So I say ok. He starts cutting and next thing I know, he's done. I [Jen] turn around and he chopped ALL MY HAIR OFF! It's a really cute short bob thing, but HE CHOPPED IT ALL OFF!!! So I call Kevin to tell him about this and the church. I start bawling when I get to the hair part. I kept thinking, "Oh man, he's going to be so mad, so mad!" [he wouldn't be that mad] I kept dancing around the information, then I had to wake up. C R A Z Y!

Just before using, wash the berries in cold water

You know what I had for breakfast? Vanilla pudding with blueberries. So what? They were fresh blueberries I picked this morning!! My mom told me they were opening up the farm to pick blueberries so when I woke up, I decided to just go on up and get some. It was SO crowded!and this picture is after some people had left. I've been apple picking, but that's about it. This was kinda fun. Would have been more fun if someone would have gone with me, but, eh, fun anyway. I asked Kevin if he would take me apple picking when I moved up to NY. He said no cause it was far away. I love hot apple cider on a beautiful fall day. He said we could buy some apple cider from the store. So not the same! Whatev. We'll go. I know this. So now we have 1.83lbs. of blueberries picked by yours truly. I can make pie, cobbler, muffins, jam. All out of blueberries! Okay, maybe not all of that stuff...But maybe the cobbler. I do like a good cobbler.

Excuse me while I freak out for a second.

So...I was watching television with my mom last night. I thought of what month it was. I loudly said, "Mom!"
She said, "what?" just as loud only somewhat irritated.
"It's July!"
"Yeah?" She responded with this 'Why-you-so-crazy' look.
I don't understand why she couldn't figure out that my, "It's July" comments actually meant, "It's July and I'm getting married in September! And I'm moving to New York City! And there's still a lot to do! I'm freaking out!" She couldn't understand that? My mom doesn't know me at all....

Rehearsal Rehearsal Rehearsal Rehearsal

I got some super cute jewelry to go with my wedding rehearsal dress. My dress is black halter style and I got hot pink necklace, bracelet, earrings, and purse to go with. How cute will that be? Very cute. I'm excited about our rehearsal dinner. Kevin picked out Great Wall of China Buffet. Yay! They have all types of food, sushi bar, and a Mongolian BBQ. My favorite part is the hand-dipped ice-cream. They have the BEST flavor.

Birthday Party:

Throw yourself a party year-round! Streamers of creamy blue frosting swirls and sequin candy confetti decorate a delectable white-cake flavored ice cream. It's a party in itself, no matter what the occasion.

Why thank-you, I WILL throw myself a party! fo sho. SOOOSOOOSOOOOOSOOOOOOOSOOOOOOSOOOOSOOO Good, you have no idea. Everything about this buffet is the coolest. My mom keeps suggesting other places, she thinks it's weird to have the rehearsal dinner at a buffet? They have a back room that's kinda private. I think it will be wonderful. And their actual Chinese food is quite delectable as well.

Happy New Month!

Today is the first day of July!

This should be a fun month? Fireworks, and all sorts of other fun stuff. Yes! It will be a fun month! We've been slowly gathering fun little toys for our kids' table. It is a separate table that's going to be covered in butcher paper [so the kids can draw on it] and have a lot of little toys for the girls and boys to play with. Since 8 of my bridal party are under the age of 8, it just made sense. Speaking of the wedding: The start of july means only 67 days left till the weding! 67!!! If only it were 1 day left till the wedding....oh well, soon enough.